Shop til you Drop

I’m not much of a shopper.

Probably because I don’t really like parting with my money, and parting with one’s money is of course a non-negotiable aspect of shopping.

If you don’t part with your money it’s called stealing, and that can get you into way worse trouble than shopping can.

Anyway, I digress.

I’ve seen a bit of the usual annual coverage of the Boxing Day sales recently, and I’ve been informed that lots of people are still spending a fair chunk of their time on Boxing Day buying millions of dollars’ worth of stuff in the Boxing Day sales.

I’m not sure how people even have money to spend after Christmas personally. 

Not only that, why would they want to get up at the crack of dawn the day after Christmas to go and fight with traffic and crowds, when they already have a veritable mountain of stuff at home?  Are they masochistic, and keen to endure more clogged parking areas and busy shopping centres even after the anguish of the long Christmas lead up?

I’m as keen on a sale and love paying less for something as the next person, but I can’t for the life of me understand how the Boxing Day sales pull in such crowds. 

I’d much rather sleep in at home, catch up with much loved family and friends, and eat leftovers.

This is because while I’m not much of a shopper, I always love to eat. 

Luckily for me, food outlets always go along with shopping, and they make the whole experience digestible to me, pardon the pun.

Apart from eating and drinking at cafes and food halls, most of the time the only other thing I actually hand money over for at the shops are groceries.      

Groceries of course are not fun or glamorous to purchase.  They simply keep one’s body alive. 

Grocery shopping is also not the kind of thing I would choose to do for fun.

I especially hate it when I land one of those sloppy shop assistants that scans my groceries and then dumps them next to my shopping bags, rather than actually helping to pack the shopping bags.  This is in a situation where I’ve quickly placed the bags on the other end of the counter prior to hurriedly unloading all my groceries for scanning, and I haven’t had the time to take care of the other end.  Then an already red faced me has to work furiously at the packing end and put up with awkward stares from both the shop assistant and the next customer who I am apparently holding up.

However most of the time I use the self-serve checkouts, probably because I have subconscious masochistic tendencies. 

In my experience the sensor technology on self-serve checkouts is still completely dysfunctional, despite the fact that such checkouts have been around for plenty of time now.

Any movement whatsoever in “the bagging area” causes a complete shut-down of the entire system.  This is because placing items in a bag apparently happens without any movement at all.  

If my hand accidentally moves anywhere on the right side of the scanner, this will lock down the whole checkout. Not only that, but the orange flashing rotating beacon dickhead light on my checkout will immediately turn on, other customers will stare at me, and the endlessly patient attendant will have to rush over yet again to reassure the checkout that I wasn’t in fact stealing a trolley load of groceries.  As a result, most of the time I find that it’s quicker to pile all my groceries up on the tiny stainless steel square, pay for my groceries, pull my receipt out, and then pack everything when the checkout no longer gives a shit about what I’m doing.

Then, hooray!!!  I can finally go home and stay away from the shops again for as long as possible.

© Annemaree Jensen 2019

The awesome photos used in this article were taken from the amazing website pexels.com.